You’re single, and/or a workaholic. It’s Christmas, and aside from going to church, you don’t care for the festivities.

God love your friends, but you want to drop their presents off in advance and disappear? There’s no better place to spend Christmas than Vegas if you’re single, and I’ll tell you why.

It may sound sad and kind of a shame? But right before Christmas, up to right before New Year’s is a slow time for the Strip hotels. I know because I used to live and work out there. My life was practically shaped around what conventions were in town and how busy the Strip traffic is. I’m telling you because I know this…

You can get anything short of fellatio from a Strip hotel if you go during the slow season.

Bonuses:

• The weather is cooler - none of that 115 degree bullshit like during the summer, when everyone and their momma inexplicably goes to Vegas.
• Not only is just about everything less expensive,
• … they are also less crowded.
• You can afford to bring your family if this is a couple/group getaway idea, though I’d leave young kids behind. That whole rebrand-Vegas-as-family-fun thing didn’t quite work out.
• Be treated like a High Roller just because there’s no one else for them to lavish their attention on.
• If you can’t help but work, bring your laptop. Almost all hotels have some kind of decent wireless internet access. Except the Luxor. Bastards.

I’ll bet you flights to Vegas are cheap right now too. I’d suggest staying at THE hotel at Mandalay Bay (don’t let them put you in the regular Mandalay Bay hotel unless you ahve teenage kids), the Wynn, or Lake Las Vegas.

Do NOT stay at the Luxor. It looks cool, but it’s so… Not. The service is terrible. And they once upgraded me to a deluxe room after not having mine ready, then proceeded to charge me the high roller rate for my stay. Lucky for me it was covered by my host. But still.

I’ll have more Vegas advice that’s geared more to conventions another day.