I Are Growed UP! 5 Ways In Which I’m Not a Kid Anymore.
- 2
- Add a Comment
Today, for the first time, I realized that I am a grown up, in a way that didn’t scare me.
- I run my own business, that is in the black, and has always been debt-free. This is the 1st one I have run that both made a profit and survived the period in which most small businesses fail, successfully.
- I have a house now. I have had a house for six months, but I was on the West coast and it was on the East coast. Today is my first day living in it as the owner.
- Both my parents see me as equals. This is weird because in a way, they’ve always seen me as their contemporary and have always spoken to me as if I was a young adult, not a snot-nosed, holy terror of a kid, which I was. But this is the first time that I’ve seen that they view me with respect.
- I’m not afraid anymore! (Shout-out to my fellow Donnie Darko fans who get that joke.) Life used to terrify me. Occassionally, certain things still do. My sister is pregnant with twins and on the rare occassion that she calls in the middle of the night I’m scared out of my skin. But it’s a concern scared, not a oh-no-a-problem-run-for-the-hills type of scared.
- For the first time, I look on my future from a position filled with hope, captain of my life boat, admiral of a fleet of options… I don’t know any other way to kill that metaphor.
And I’ll tell you a secret. *looks around* I have wanted to be 35 years old my whole life, and now I am. This is the point at which, for some reason, I knew in my heart that my entire life would really start to work out, that I’d have a happy, stable stretch that may have its ups and downs, but would not be treacherous and rocky like the first part of my life.
Maybe it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. Whatever it is, I don’t much care because it’s turning out exactly the way I have been preparing for, or even better, on all counts. :)
Do you remember the moment when you first felt like a real grown up - in a good way? What was it like? Do you still feel that way most of the time?
[tags]grown-up, grownup, being a grown up, i’m grown, donnie darko, life, lockergnome[/tags]
2 Comments
ShadowMyth
July 1st, 2007
at 5:55pm
I still worried about being carded when I would forgot my ID, all the way into my 30’s. I guess it was that authoritarian energy. My parents & family only recently began to treat me as the proverbial adult, and I am 40. I never really wanted to be an adult though, just responsible. I always figured being a *grown up* was a sign that you’d stopped growing, so I avoided it like the plaque. Now I just feel like a person, and I can’t even relate to the whole kid/grown up thing. I know what you mean though, when you reach that point where you really feel like your life is your own, and it’s no longer dictated by other people. It’s a good feeling. I have a friend who is 42, and he called to tell me this week he finally felt like an adult. He moved this week into his new house; it was the first place he had ever lived in by himself.
Ms. Wahala
July 1st, 2007
at 6:39pm
You know, now that you mention it, I get more carded now than I ever did as a kid. But I had like, double D’s when I was in my teens, so people just looked at my chest and figured I had to be at least 21, LOL. I don’t really *worry* about it, but it does concern me, but as a chick, it’s also flattering.
You hit the nail on the head though, really feeling like my life belongs to me.