Now, if you are into a particular field of study or interest, and you have someone ask you for advice, give them the best advice you can. If you are asking the advice. Listen to the people. if they are a friend of yours they should not steer you wrong.

Case in point, I was asked by a friend who is the director of a community theatre where I live. He asked me recently what we needed for a sound system for a touring show we are doing to the local elementary schools. Well, he got the mics, arranged for us to borrow a decent sound control board, and even got us two powered external speakers for the main outputs. However, I told him for monitors we would need a power amp.

Ok, here is some basic sound advice for those looking at running sound for big shows and musicals. Most good sound mixers do not have a way to power the output. Now for small bands, Peavy is good as it gives powered output. Peavy is REALLY REALLY bad for professional audio, like musicials abnd theatrical use. Now, when you have an non powered output source going into a non powered speaker, the sounds is going to be LOW. If you can get sound output, you are not going to get much of it, and when you do, it’s very easy to get it to distort because you are going to have to have it way too hot to get any output. Kind of like listening to an IPOD set loud with the earphones on the desk in front of you. Now, take a pair of speakers that are powred, and the audio sounds fine. Why is that you ask, well the answer is simple.

It’s because the powered speakers have built in power amps (power amplifiers) that take the sound, amplify it, and output it in one cabinet. These speakers have a power cord that plus into them and supplies the external power that the amp needs to function. Most powered sepakers also have both the subwoofer (for bass) and tweeter (for higher pitched sounds) built in the same cabinet as well.

Now today, at the rehearsal, one of the cast says, “I can’t hear the music”.. I nearly lost it. Not only am I stressed at not having a moment to do anyting except set up the system, let alone having to get the director and tour manager to set the wireless mics up, I get that. I reply, “Well, I tried to find a solution that was free for us. Sadly, it didn’t work.. So I am getting some other stuff later tonight to try to make it work.” To this the director, who I consider a real friend, said, “Don’t flip out.” At that point I shot him a look that could have melted ice. He doesn’t know how close he came to losing the only person he has right now that can run sound and knows what he looks for in tech stuff. I volunteer, and for a friend to to say that to someone who is giving their damn time to help him… That is not cool.

Now, I will take to chat cast member, who is a col guy. He was giving an excuse as to why he was messing up the song. I hate to tell him, but that about he times that he could hear the music and he messed up? But, thanks to our touring manager Daniel, we should have a power amp that I can jury rig to work with that we got. Just gotta get the theatre board to spring for come couplers, converters and good long mic/speaker cords. Of course, I will get the old, “But we dont have the money, I mean we just spent $6000 on wireless mics.. Why do we need to buy more things?” Sadly, they fail to realize that the wireless mics are but one component in a cascade that is sound design.

Okay, we all know that most problems in our everyday existence outside of work or school will not deal with algebra, calculus, trigonometry , or any other advanced mathematical study. However, there is one study of math that we tend to use, and that is the basic math.

By basic math, I mean addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division. We use these every day of our lives. However, it seems nowadays, that if people don’t have a damn calculator in their hand, they can’t even figure out simple addition. I was in the convenient store earlier this evening, when I was heading home from the rehearsals. Well, i was standing in line, and this women, about forty, who looked about as smart as a turnip and that is only if I feel inhospitable toward vegetables. It took her a few minutes to be able to process the only other person in the store’s lottery ticket. Finally, after the computer wouldn’t take the card, she punched it in by hand. So, she tells him that he has a four dollar ticket and an eleven dollar ticket. He said, just give me the cash. She goes over to the and gets fifteen dollars out of the drawer, and as she is walking the few steps toward the man, you could see her give that dipshit look, and I knew exactly what she was thinking. She was thinking the number eleven, and mentally counting four fingers till she counted four, to see that she was right with the fifteen dollars.

I’m sorry, but if you have to think hard about 11 + 4, then you should not be in a job where you are in charge of taking money, counting money, or simply touching money. I mean convenient stores are hurting to get people in there to work. They know they can’t get rally good people there, because they normally get the people who are either really stupid idiots, alcoholics, druggies, or they get the people with five kids, a five pack a day habit, and the IQ of dirt.

One thing the government could do is eliminate all calculators from grade school classrooms. I mean, when I went to high school, we could not use calculators. Not even on algebra. I mean if you went on to calc, then yes, you could use one. Not saying that i am “too old”, but it’s only been thirteen years since I graduated. I mean why do students in middle/jr high school need calculators? If they can’t figure out the math there in their head, then the government has failed to educate that child. I hear a lot of people making jokes about “How stupid W is..” Sorry, but most of the current generation of children will make him look like Albert Fucking Einstein.

Okay, first of all, in some states like Tennessee, most restaurants use the inferior knowledge of the citizens to make them think that all diners must be carded when ordering beer. However, how does that make people over the age of 50 feel? Unless the waiter or waitress is completely blind as a bat, then you can tell they are over the age of 21. You can tell they are old enough to drink. So, do you think carding them makes them feel younger, no it tends to piss them off.

My dad, when he goes into restaurants, he’ll order a beer. If the waiter/waitress ask to see ID, he will change it to a water. To him, that is a sign of disrespect. On the night of March 24th 2008, I wasn’t in the mood to hear him go at it with the waitress, who for her pour soul had probably never had to put up with a cranky old bastard like him. He started his dead, and the waitress wondered if she had done something wrong. He was about to tell her all sorts of stuff about how it was it was an insult, blah blah blah. However, I stopped him and out assholed the old asshole.

I mean, if her management told her to do that, DO NOT BLAME THE WAITRESS! Tell them that you want to talk to the manager. When the manager gets there, give him or her the crap you were going to give the waitress. The waitress must follow the rules. The manager can make the decision, because you are older, that you don’t have to be carded. This way, you can bitch at who needs it, and the poor waitress can have a decent night, instead of a night of bad thoughts because of some seventy year old jackass. Sorry dad, but you sir are an asshole.

A Witty Joke

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Chris Pirillo’s Phone Phun.

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