I always feel foolish when I’m out shopping for a bottle of wine. Wandering through those aisles of reds and whites is a bewildering experience. While I freely admit that I need help picking out a dinner wine, I’m always too embarrassed to ask the wine store clerk. Consequently, I’ve been thinking about signing up for a wine club. Having an online wine club automatically deliver a couple of award-winning bottles each month would be a pain-free way to accumulate a collection… one that stands in stark contrast to my last hair-raising excursion to the wine store.
I was so traumatized by my last trip to the wine store that I haven’t been back in almost a year.
There I was, wheeling my shopping cart through the aisles, when I stopped to read the description of a Merlot from a vineyard I recognized from a trip to Napa (after a Seybold Publishing Conference, way back when). I’m standing there, reading the oh-so-persuasive copy. I didn’t notice that the cart had started to roll into an end cap display of wine until it was too late.
I caught the collision out of the corner of my eye. It was as if everything happened in slow motion. The top of the display held just half a dozen bottles. Two of those bottles fell over safely within the confines of the cardboard box. I managed to catch another bottle before it fell to the floor. But I was unable to do anything to prevent three bottles from hitting the linoleum.
Whap! Whap! Whap!
Red wine covered the aisle. It looked like a Sam Peckenpaugh film. I looked around sheepishly, and wanted to crawl inside a box and hide.
A clerk arrived with a mop and bucket within minutes (or was it hours). He laughed and told me not to worry about a thing. It happens all the time, apparently.
I didn’t bother asking him what would be a good wine to have with turkey.
I was the turkey…