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Carson Daly Ignores Writers’ Strike

Carson Daly has decided to cross the Writers Guild picket line and go back to his miserable excuse for a TV show, joining Ellen DeGeneres in the Scab Hall of Fame. To add insult to injury, Daly set up a special Scab Joke Hotline so his friends could call in special scab jokes to [...]

No More Tofurky!

For vegetarians, Thanksgiving can be a very disturbing holiday. The killing of a bird, no matter how ugly, despicable or delicious, is no cause for celebration. And you all know what Tofurky tastes like!
Just because we’re pretending that our ancestors got along famously with Native Americans is no reason to go around killing [...]

Yula’s Ark - Chapter 26

Kerry went back to Berkeley and continued her studies. She aimed for pre-law and environmental studies. Gault went with her, not as her lover anymore, but as a friend–after all, they’d been through so much together.
The investigation of the mill fire continued at a slow pace. The incendiary device was found. A professional job, the [...]

Yula’s Ark - Chapter 25

Xavier felt better as the dawn crept under the cabin. At least he had a plan now. He would test the machine. Once. If the others didn’t return he’d go home alone. He and Abcedif would put their heads together–Xavier would insist on being involved this time–and Xavier would return for the others with a [...]

Yula’s Ark - Chapter 24

Xavier rested his head on the backpack. He heard gunfire in the woods but didn’t care anymore. He’d fixed the contraption, or at least thought he had. In his cough syrup drunkenness, he couldn’t be sure. No time for tests. Not again. One blast and we’re gone.
A breeze blew under the cabin, but Xavier was [...]

Yula’s Ark - Chapter 23

The road looked like salvation to Kerry. Gault hadn’t spoken to her since she’d asked the sheriff about Raymond. Gault didn’t seem angry or jealous so much as worried. He’s worried about his damn organization, Kerry decided. That would be just like him. Doesn’t care who his girl sleeps with as long as it doesn’t [...]

Yula’s Ark - Chapter 22

They had made it several yards into the brush when Scott
glanced back through the trees to see Steadman come out the
trail into the clearing in front of the cabin.
“Mr. Felton!” Steadman called.
Scott turned into the wilderness. He, Yula and Tenner
continued west.
Xavier sat stock-still under the cabin, his legs crossed,
his mind focused on every sound.
Outside, [...]

Yula’s Ark - Chapter 21

It could have been anyone. Steadman wouldn’t put it past Ranson to sabotage his own factory. The lumber business was a dead-end proposition, anyone could tell that. Logging would end, whether the environmentalists won or the companies eliminated all the trees. The insurance would put Ranson in a position to start some other business elsewhere.
The [...]

Yula’s Ark - Chapter 20

Steadman’s map was covered with marks. He would station
men at the top of the ridge before going up alone, from the
road, like the last visit. The strangers would go into the
woods and Scott would stay to talk. Steadman knew he could
easily arrest Scott. That would only leave the others. The [...]

Yula’s Ark - Chapter 19

The night was black and alive. Yula sat on the porch and catalogued the sounds: crickets, an owl, the breeze. The cabin itself groaned. The men slept soundly inside, Xavier occasionally coughing in his sleep. Yula wished she could do something for him. He wouldn’t take enough of the cough medicine. He said it made [...]

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