What Do Woman Want in a Guy?
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According to Engage.com a singles site women regard old-fashioned manners as the most important thing from the time dating begins and throughout their time together. This means that the rules of courtship conduct mean that the guy opens the car door for her, as well as, any other door that they are to enter. Additionally, according to Pepper Schwartz, a sociology professor at the University of Washington in Seattle, women also want to find a guy who is on the same intellectual plain that she is.
She also found that the majority of women want a man with a sense of humor and with a giving type personality. That doesn’t mean that he goes without and gives beyond his means. Rather it means that if the woman isn’t of the high maintenance variety the male simply needs to be there for the emotional needs that she has and doesn’t allow important dates and events to go by unnoticed. For most women even a small gift on a special occasion makes a difference in how they feel but remember you cannot buy love anymore than you can friendship.
Last on a woman’s list is a desire for the guy to be at least somewhat romantic. What does that mean? According to Scott Halzman, author of The Secrets of Happily Married Women, it is all about the man taking responsibility for remembering important dates, listening to what she actually says instead of assuming what she means, and being aware of personal things like her favorite color or perfume fragrance.
Overall, all the experts basically agree that what women want in a mate hasn’t changed much over the years. If he has a sense of humor, is kind and makes her feel like she is the most important person in the world to him he can’t fail to gain her interest. What has changed, however, is that today’s women is less likely to let the guy run the show. She wants a say in the decisions that are made.
Lastly, it is interesting to note that according to True.com fewer than 10% of women list income as a key criterion in finding a mate. In fact, the remaining 90% value a big heart over a big wallet and since they make their own money few will settle for less than they are looking for in a mate just to get married.
6 Comments
mhz
May 22nd, 2008
at 1:48pm
You mean intellectual “plane?” OOPS. Darn, I blew it. That won’t score any points. LOL.
mhz
May 22nd, 2008
at 2:00pm
FYI, your link at the top titled “reflections”, directly under the date, is giving an error:
Fatal error: Call to undefined function get_avatar() in /nfs/www/www.lockergnome.com/wp-content/themes/default/archive.php on line 26
Hope that helps.
zenium
May 22nd, 2008
at 4:51pm
Yeah and I dated a high maintenance woman. Not much fun there. Opening the car door and any other door became a chore to do. She would actually stand in front of the door and wait for you to go around her to open the door.
And for small gifts. Forget it! ‘everyday’ is her birthday so you must buy her something (and not something cheap). And make sure you always buy the most expensive for her. However do not spend money on yourself, because that takes away from what you can spend on her.
And heaven forbid if your hands are already full, you still must carry all her other bags.
Bottom line. I think if women want respect they have to earn it by their own actions. And that means not following some old male-female ritual.
I respect women that show respect for me and others and does not try to manipulate the situation because of being female.
OmniDragon
May 23rd, 2008
at 7:46pm
“listening to what she actually says instead of assuming what she means” <<< before i even read any further, that ……RIGHT there, is the reason i broke up with the last one……and one (just one) of the reasons i haven’t been in a relationship in a while. I…..really hate it when people try to read my mind instead of listening to what_i_say! Miscommunication or the lack thereof is the number one relationships killer.
p.s. “This means that the rules of courtship conduct mean that the guy opens the car door for her” <<< Ladies: Does that mean that you only want us to open car doors during courtship? :\ just asking…cause i do that….all the time…it’s a man thing
p.s.s. I’d believe those numbers from True.com if they were reversed. Sorry, but I’ve seen too many people get burned in the past by someone who was just tryin to turn out their wallets.
It’s actually a very rare and special thing when you find a woman who actually loves you…….for you. Fellas, if you find that girl or if she finds you, you’re a very lucky man ;)
jasbo
May 23rd, 2008
at 11:07pm
I think women are very hard to read, i book i can read, women say something but mean something else, whats up with that.
And i also don’t know about this door business, i say let them open doors on there own.!11
Paul sherman
May 27th, 2008
at 6:50am
“…listening to what she actually says instead of assuming what she means”
Maybe it should read “rather than trying to figure out of what she means”
Here’s a small fact that affects verbal communication…
Men on average say about 2000 words/day. Women say about 7000. That’s a huge gap - I have enough problem following verbal communications. When it’s coming at me 3.5 times more than I can manage, forget listening; it’s usually more than I can do to figure what she means.
Public speaking lessons emphasize that the speaker fit their speach to the audience. Trying to force the audience to adapt to your speaking pattern guarantees you’ll lose them.
And women wonder why men don’t seem to listen - the verbal barrage simply overwhelms us.