Overweight Elton Morale Crumbling Pedalboard

Overweight should be protected

• In San Francisco, a doctor may mention weight to a patient but if the patient doesn’t want to talk about it, the doctor is `asked to respect those wishes’.
• London wants to follow San Francisco
• The group in question is called the Size Acceptance Movement
• If you wish to walk around with feces smeared on you, will we have to tolerate a Feces Acceptance Movement?  Will you be referred to as a Feces Acceptance Movement?
• Will anybody ever accept responsibility?

Astronomers Find 32 New Extrasolar Planets

• Republicans declare that God just created them
• Democrats want to spend $567 trillion to explore them (with no tax increases)
• Michael Schermer pronounces the planets `swamp gas’.
• found through the High Accuracy Radial Velocity Planet Searcher (HARPS) spectrometer
• verified by Searching Component On Planet Earth (SCOPE)

Elton John Regrets Waiting To Lose His Virginity Until He Was 23

• no word on who (or what) he lost it to
• frequently wears a crown and calls himself `Queen of England’
• can somebody please tell me why this is news?

U.S. launches aid for state, local housing agencies

• because the banks and the automakers weren’t enough
• will allow them to borrow from the US Treasury(!)
• on the bright side, the Impeach Obama campaign has started

U.S. must live within its means: Geithner

• This from the treasury secretary during the largest giveaways in history
• the Federal Reserve is neither federal nor a reserve, nor is is accountable to the taxpayers
• how did he say this without breaking into laughter?

Democrats and Republicans Support $250 Senior Stimulus

• oh look: matching morons!
• they support anything except slashing their healthcare benefits
• if they stopped taxing us to death, they wouldn’t need this alleged stimulus

Morale crumbling among US and British troops in Afghanistan

• many soldiers believe that the war is not justified and not worth dying for.
• could it be that our soldiers are finally seeing past the smokescreen?
• maybe they will be so demoralized they’ll have to come home!

86% of Lifehacker Readers Are Upgrading to Windows 7

• now there’s a smart demographic
• 26% have pre-ordered: clearly the best and brightest
• 34% already using it: “We’ll jump on anything“
• “Yeah, but it’s new and pretty!”

DIY Pedalboard With Some Help From IKEA

• it’s cheap, it’s orange!
• high stage visibility - more difficult to trip over
• buy two for stereo (or for your Frank Marino show)