I’ve already mentioned my great love of local news. I don’t think I realized how inane it was until I saw it again after years of getting my news from other places.

My wife was watching local news when I got home from work today. They went to commercial, which featured the female lead anchor, who just stepped out of the Perfect Factory (not so much as a hair out of place), doing a promo for the late news.

“A nice glass of ice water,” she said, “refreshing on a hot day. Unless you have an allergy. An allergy to cold” [insert ominous music]. Many people have an allergy to cold. Are you one of them? Find out tonight at ten pm.”

Not one to miss my chance, I went right into my commerical:

“Air. It’s all around us. To breathe. Unless you’re allergic to air. Are you allergic to air? Find out tonight at ten, when Fox News runs the special report, Allergic to Air.”

C’mon. This is what passes for news? I thought it was horrible when they used local news as a commercial for the show that came next. Now it has even less purpose. It wasn’t even exciting for me when a different Miss Perfect emailed bikini shots of herself to her male friend’s wife. I don’t care if Tim Russert returns from the Other Side each night and has a myocardial infarction on live tv. Give me some content, for the love of news, people!

My wife is too smart for this. She just shakes her head and flees when she hears a good Local News Rant<TM> coming on.