President Stupid hasn’t said anything really out of character (even for him) lately. Until yesterday.

Yesterday in an interview, he stated that he had given up golf, in sympathy with the troops.

As usual, let me count the ways:

1. He doesn’t play golf.
2. He has also given up slamming his dick (Cheney) in the doorway of Air Force One.
3. He gave up Limburger cheese for Lent.
4. He knows nobody pays attention to a thing he says anyway.
5. He bet Cheney he could overcome his golf addiction.
6. Halliburton stopped making his favorite golf clubs.
7. Got tired of his wife reminding him that he couldn’t find the hole.
8. Secret Service got tired of moving the hole to his ball.
9. His boss (the vice president) told him to quit.
10. He was way too weak from trying to pronounce `nuclear’.