Honest Trailers Take on Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones

Who do you think would win a fight between Darth Saruman and a Jedi Dickhead? Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones came out more than 10 years ago. We should be able to laugh about it now, right? The Screen Junkies give us an Honest Trailer in an attempt to make us forget the taste of stale popcorn and anger over not spending our money seeing Harvard Man, instead.

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Our resident "Bob" (pictured here through the lens of photographer Jason DeFillippo) is in love with a woman who talks to animals. He has a fondness for belting out songs about seafaring and whiskey (arguably inappropriate in most social situations). He's arm-wrestled robots and won. He was born in a lighthouse on the storm-tossed shores of an island that has since been washed away and forgotten, so he's technically a citizen of nowhere. He's never killed in anger. He once underwent therapy for having an alien in his face, but he assures us that he's now feeling "much better." Fogarty also claims that he was once marooned along a tiny archipelago and survived for months using only his wits and a machete, but we find that a little hard to believe.