Tiki Tissue Box Inspires Volcanic Noseblowing

Blow Your Nose Like a Volcano with the Tiki Tissue Box

Why blow your nose like a mere mortal when you can blow your nose like a mighty Polynesian volcano while the Tiki Tissue Box looks on with silent approval? [Image shared by Amazon]

The giant Moai statues of the Rapa Nui people who once inhabited Easter Island in the South Pacific have stood as silent sentries over their barren, deforested homeland for centuries. And while their true purpose remains a mystery, their creation was no doubt an exercise in human ambition that rivals similarly mysterious endeavors like pyramids found around the world and the megaliths of Stonehenge.

In modern times, these majestic, solemn stone faces that inspired awe upon discovery by western explorers have entered the lexicon of kitsch as mere accoutrements of the ubiquitous tiki bar. While it may seem disrespectful of the backbreaking work that went into creating them, we have to concur that the legacy of the Moai might very well have perished, buried on a rock in the middle of the ocean, if bartenders of fruity umbrella drinks hadn’t repurposed them to suit an environment of frivolity over godlike contemplation.

So why not take this potential blasphemy a step further? The Tiki Tissue Box recalls the imposing power of the Moai while discreetly covering up whatever bland, boring box surrounds your disposable snot catchers.

Okay, so maybe “discreetly” isn’t the right word we’re looking for, here. The Tiki Tissue Box presides majestically over any room where it finds itself — whether it’s your bedroom, living room, parlor, bathroom, outhouse, home office — silently commanding attention from residents and guests, alike, while dispensing tissues (Kleenex brand or otherwise) with quiet dignity.

Your Tiki Tissue Box is the Friend Whose Nose You Can Pick

They say that you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose. As Dwight Schrute would say: “False!”

The Tiki Tissue Box is the friend whose nose you can pick.

Whether you’re in the middle of an allergic sneezing attack or fending off the plagues of flu season, your misery will be somewhat diminished by the absurd sight of the Tiki Tissue Box and its helpful supply of nose wipers. Remember: laughter is the best medicine, after all.

Be prepared for the sneezin’ season with your own Tiki Tissue Box! It also makes a great gift for the other season ’tis almost!

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I have been writing for LockerGnome since relocating to Missouri seven years ago, where I continue to be a technology enthusiast who enjoys playing with the newest and latest gadgets.