Superman Beach Towel Keeps Towel Week Superbly Safe

While we pointed out how a lucky kid in your life could benefit from having a Superman Hooded Bath Towel, you may have been disheartened to find that we couldn’t recommend something more your size. Be disheartened no longer! We’ve discovered a perfectly adult-sized Superman Beach Towel that you can wave proudly on Towel Day for the world to see. What? You don’t want recognition for your good taste? Sorry, but we couldn’t find a Clark Kent Beach Towel.

Superman Beach Towel Keeps Towel Week Superbly Safe
[Image: Amazon]

Get your own Superman Beach Towel here! Before someone makes you choose a side in the Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice battle.

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Our resident "Bob" (pictured here through the lens of photographer Jason DeFillippo) is in love with a woman who talks to animals. He has a fondness for belting out songs about seafaring and whiskey (arguably inappropriate in most social situations). He's arm-wrestled robots and won. He was born in a lighthouse on the storm-tossed shores of an island that has since been washed away and forgotten, so he's technically a citizen of nowhere. He's never killed in anger. He once underwent therapy for having an alien in his face, but he assures us that he's now feeling "much better." Fogarty also claims that he was once marooned along a tiny archipelago and survived for months using only his wits and a machete, but we find that a little hard to believe.