Quite some time ago I had several problem dogs, one after the other.   Finally it sank in; it wasn’t the dogs, it was me.   I was insecure, overwhelmed by what seemed to be forces beyond my control.   There were problems with my significant other, circumstances were tenous at best, and my self image was at an all-time low.

However, there was one area in which I had total confidence.   If I had the desire, I had the tenacity to learn anything.   So on December 31, 2002 I bought a computer-in-a-box from the local office supply store and on January 1, 2003 sat down at a keyboard for the first time.   Hours later, the traditional New Year’s pork roast was very, very crispy and the adventure began.   Having a part-time job, I was able to spend hours every day learning to use the computer itself, Windows XP, touch-typing, the Internet and various software programs already on the machine.   Then came my still-favorite image editing program, PaintShop Pro.   The tutorials and user groups helped beyond anything I could have learned in a classroom.   The hours formerly spent watching TV, doing needlework or other leisure activities were concentrated on learning.

Computers and the Internet provided the resources to move into a bigger world.   The positive energy this created in my life changed me.   I was now in control.   After a time, I solved the problems and became myself, free to choose the life I wanted and to go for it.   I put my stuff and my dog in a U-Haul, crossed four state lines and started over.   I am the Big Dog, the one who doesn’t have to fuss and fight and juggle for position in an uncertain world.

The adventure continues…

Lisa Miller